Cacoethes.

Inundating the drought to sod,
The red sand mixed with sang froid
Oh, the rattling fix that the clay bore
Was all dethawed.
Breaking down the being so vulnerable yet pure.

Who would undo those strands for her now?

Tenacious they are.
But that elysian beauty she marred.
Filling in the gaps between those fingers
The flashes you hindered.

But staring in the dark
How could one decipher that brilliant mark?
That little yes and that little no
Oh, it was the story told by him so.

The politics of the free space,
Filled in with that purple haze.

Black then white then colours with black and white
Flip! Flip! Flip!

Through the galaxy so sublime and deep
She jaunted.
The planet soon will be hit by the meteorite
Yet she felt no contrite.
Yes, the planet she once owned
Will forever be haunted.

Yes,the carapace saved her the scars.
But the planet still charred.
And who knew the flashes will burn her insides
If she ever fell apart.

Shriveling to nihility,
It was her Janus heart.

Dicey and Deuce

Everybody pushed me off that edge to swim against that current. But I was hopeful still, for she swam along. That suddenly I realized I was toiling all alone, while she became a question and eventually out of question. With fatigued limbs I could struggle no more and forfeited.
And the dream broke.
I opened my eyes into absolute darkness just to look into her tapetum lucidum and surprisingly she was staring back, as if she could see through me, read my mind and when every human refused to be humane enough , she sat there sympathizing with me in that darkness, then snuggled so close to me as if assuaging all my worries. Yes, Dicey, the cat. Her green eyes seem to acknowledge every ounce of pain that I’m going through and that wagging seem to play those lines by Coldplay- “ You just want somebody listening to what you say, It doesn’t matter who you are”

And realizing that wagging tail I drift into that rhythmic trance and sleep again.

Then I wake up to that smell of morning glory, and rush downstairs for he waits for me every morning. Deuce, the dog, greets me complainingly because Dicey was privileged to sleep with me and he had to stay away all the while because, of course he couldn’t have intruded her territory. He makes those uncanny noises to vent out his exasperation. But soon he gets over with that woofing and arfing and gestures me to play with him, rolling on the floor and wagging. I scratch his belly and he bares his teeth to give me that wide grin, and I’d confess I haven’t seen a dog smiling like him. He looks like a perfect epitome of joy and love to me when everything else has faded.

Candidly, I’d confess Deuce makes me live through the day while Dicey sings me lullaby at night.
How does it matter if we don’t belong to the same species? Who says they are not human enough?

- The Phoenice

Echoes

After an insanely impetuous weekend , i have been feeling a little ringing in my ears (maybe because of that blaring music) for past three days, that suddenly today during my developmental biology lecture, the ringing faded and i started getting echo of every word she spoke.
It felt like there was a voice coming from inside my head, It was galling to an extent that i started losing my nerve and couldn't stand people conversing around.
I was getting an echo of every friggin' voice before i could even notice . I rushed out of the class to get some peace.
*I needed Peace*
The breeze on my face didn't sound like the one outside , It felt like some hurricane inside.
It made me feel totally alien, Like i'm floating in outer space.
She said it could be uneven air pressure, he said it could be tinnitus ,they said it could be something with my eustachian tube.
While i needed some *space* from everything around.
I needed to get away.
I needed to rush to my room where there could be just me and my *soul-self*
Maybe it's tinnitus or maybe it's uneven pressure
or just that
"Maybe The Good Demon wanted me to introspect".

Don't let me drown..

It’s so dark and alluring
And this rain so enthralling.
I’m getting all drenched,
Beautiful it feels
And the aridity quenched.

It’s level one,
Toe deep now,
We make paper boats,
Aww… they travel far and wide
And eventually out of sight.

The level reaches my knees,
Look around,
Ahh! It’s a wonderland,
It feels so elysian
why do they call it stygian?

Rising with every passing hour
Why do they sound so sour?
I know I won’t drown
For tomorrow is way too far.

They say it’s a jeopardy,
While the level reaches my belly
I’m still not scared
For I’m a fish and I’m a bird
Reckless and rash
But No…
Is that the thunder I just heard,
I guess I saw him row,
Where did my merman go?

If the levee breaks in another hour
Don’t you let me drown,
For tomorrow is way too far.

I look up the sky, the thunder and the rain
I know it’s too long when the sun shines again.
If the levee breaks in another hour
I implore.
Don’t you let me drown
For tomorrow is way too far.

Your Blackhole

I try to prick it with all my might,
For that burgeoning bubble
Turned from colorful to black and white.

But you don’t even move a limb,
Despite that shock of the lightning?

Is it the cold
That turned you so numb
Or the same hex
In that premature womb?

Then I see how she eviscerates you
And it all came so easy,but true
It was already a bed of nails
Yet she never undid her veil.

Now it’s like some clock stopped ticking
And those shutters shutting.
The drums don’t match that heartbeat anyway
While I behold all of it fade away.

But I try to dig that soul with all that finesse,
Only to find black and nothingness,
Blackness so dark and wide,
It was minus 5 inside.

How could I find that soul
When I was your own Blackhole .

Those Movies..and Those Sitcoms...:)

"In the kitchen.
Mum: (making me coffee) So, you ain't going out with friends today?

Me: (Staring at the kitchen wall)

Society, man! You know, society! Cause, you know what I don't understand? I don't understand why people, why every fucking person is so bad to each other so fucking often. It doesn't make sense to me. Judgment. Control. All that, the whole spectrum.

Mum: What has gotten into you?

Me: You know..parents,hypocrites, politicians ,pricks."


Yeah! It was Alexander Supertramp , When I saw “Into the wild” last year, I got so damn drugged by the character, that I decided not to leave my room for days, write random stuff, switch my phone off and cut all cords , listen to some crazy obsolete music and talk radical stuff about society.

It happens with me quite often, It's like a phenomenon.

I couldn't sleep the night after watching The Butterfly Effect,and how chaotic that Chaos Theory and that Inception was.

But then after a while the frenzy fades away and so does the idea in my mum’s mind that I should see a shrink (guffaws), because after a while I come to the realization that This is a real life and you cannot *Real A Reel* and I get back to being normal and being a little *metamorphosed* at the same time.

Well... the subject that I'm doing my majors in (genetics that is) is to an extent is also driven by this phenomenon .
It all started with Jurassic park in 4th standard ,I didn’t get the concept really well at first but when I read the book by Michael Crichton I was so intrigued and I knew that it’s gonna be genetics.
Then came CSI Miami ,and as a kid I used to picture myself as a forensic consultant in some FBI lab. And then later in 11th standard or so I started coveting Bones (Emily Deschanel) who palyed a forensic anthropologist.
The curiosity grew to an extent that I got myself an internship in Central Forensic Science Laboratory (CBI).
And it was truly one of a kind experience.

I feel Watching a sitcom is like being addicted to some drug ,green or black.
I remember watching 18 episodes of 24 a day and then wake up the next day only to watch the 19th.
Oh! How I love getting lost in them.

I admire the way Dr Gregory House (Hugh Laurie) justifies his atheism and how he thinks life is a test and how he has difficulty with the whole concept of belief, that Faith isn’t based on logic and experience.


Then again it's been happening with me for past two days now that I watched “The Social Network”

I am totally besotted by the way Jesse Eisenberg played the character of Mark Zuckerberg, and it's not about him being the youngest billionaire in the world or something.
I simply am smitten by the way he looked so stoned all the time, passionately thinking about the next best thing he needs to do, and everything he did without a speck of dilettante approach.It seems all so inspiring to me how he latched on to the little ideas from people and transmuted them into something so prodigious.

And now I have already spent two nights thinking what would my research interest be – cloning hair follicles, or how rigor mortis could happen before death, diabetes, cancer, elastin, collagen, forensic and blahh.

I simply love the phenomenon and being metamorphosed!

Come drench yourself...

The twigs and stamps we collected
Are being set afire,
They are already burning bright,
Feels like it's my own pyre.

But you can't help the conflagration ,Can you?
So, come drench yourself in this rain with me.

The twinkling stars are out of view,
For that dense cloud ,such a nebulous shrew.
No green so serene,
No yellow ,no blue.
Only loudness of black and white.
The breeze so still,
No shimmering light.

But you cant help the refraction ,can you?
So, come drench yourself in this rain with me.

The cold water on skin,
That doesn't feel so cold,
For we live in this quagmire,
With those fungus and mould.

The wet clay is drying into a shapeless new.
But you can't help the dryness ,can you?
So come drench yourself in this rain with me.

You yelled ,they prayed,
Who could have helped?
The train still derailed,
And You can't help the derailment ,can you?

You know the way out of that queue,
But you still cannot break through.

You can't stop that clock from ticking,can you?

So, come drench yourself in this rain with me...
For so long you have stayed awake,
So long have you starved,
Now let that dirt be washed away.

To let go of that insomnia,
And that barnacle anorexia.
To rise and shine and live again,
To dream that dream like a child again.

Come drench yourself in this rain with me...